War & Peace

"Examine yourself with all attention! Put a bridle on your feelings, and seek your happiness, not in your passions, but in your heart. The fountainhead of happiness is not without, but within us."

Age

In life's early years, a person's understanding and character change constantly, each new experience contributes to the formation of who that person will eventuallly become. By the time a person reaches their twenties, however, that developmental process is basically over, we are who we are and though we aren't stagnant in our progress, we are perhaps affected less often and to a lesser degree by life experience. That is to say, we are more familiar with life, less surprised by its dealings with us, and therefore more adept to deal with its challenges. So what is it like to be old? I don't know, maybe a young soul trapped in an old body. The thing that scares me the most is being overlooked, of being almost invisible, of being treated as a child, rarely (if ever) asked for an opinion, not seen as a person with hopes, dreams, strengths, weaknesses, and a lifetime of experience. How often will I be passed in the street without even being acknowledged? Will people believe, or even consider, that I was once a young woman with fears of mediocrity and failure, with ideas of furthering my education, with hopes of finding a friend with whom I can spend eternity? I want to be validated as a person...no matter my age.

Time

Doesn't it seem like each year passes by more quickly than the last? I remember as a child a year sounded (and felt) like an eternity, but as I got older, a year progressively sounded and felt like a shorter amount of time. So, I've thought about it and I think I've figured it out. :) When you are a year old, a year is equivalent to your entire lifetime, by the time you're five, a year is only 1/5 of your lifetime, so each year the year to lifetime ratio gets smaller and smaller, hence it feels and sounds shorter and shorter. So there you have it, you finally have the explanation to the strange sensation that is time.

Life

Life is a strange thing, possibly the most precious thing there is and yet often it's the least valued. How easy it is to just exist, instead of live. How easy it is to lose focus, to get caught up in the insignifcant details of day-to-day "living". It's exhausting keeping perspective, I think that's why we choose to distract ourselves with so much stuff. If I'm watching a movie I don't have to think about world hunger, if I'm sitting typing on my computer I don't have to think about global warming, if I'm filling my head and life with things (instead of ideas) I don't have to think about my character flaws. I actually look for excuses or things to occupy myself so that I don't have to just sit and think about important things. In those rare moments I actually do take the time to meditate, I feel peaceful and end up with a better understanding of myself and/or life, so why do I avoid it? Maybe because it is exhausting, maybe because it requires self-control, maybe because it's often painful to pull off those many layers of defensive covering to reveal our vulnerability and expose ourselves to the truth. Maybe because we're then responsible what we do with it.

Happiness

Happiness is not a destination,
it's a journey.
Happiness is not an end,
it's a means to one.
Happiness is not a consequence,
it's a choice.
Happiness is not a goal,
it's a plan.